The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
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