I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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