I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
