He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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