The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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