Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.