So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid