Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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