found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
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We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
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Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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