Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
why is half of my head shaved?
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