clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
