He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize