my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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