The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
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