If i come over, it means nothing
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
