you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
