just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize