i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
