last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
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No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
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its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I was not drunk enough for that final.
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