Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
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well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
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I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.