you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
29 Super Simple DIY Drinking Games
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?