My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner