I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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