capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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