She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
