OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
