it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
