dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Can Purell be used as lube?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
