Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
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