Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
