I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
