so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.