remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
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This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
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i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.