take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
honey bunches of taint.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
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