38 yer olds are good kisserssss
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
