Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
where are my eyebrows?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
