i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
