It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Randomize