If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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