When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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