I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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