Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
