Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
do nipples grow back?
Randomize