I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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