Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?

(770): View more from Georgia

I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.

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(818): Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ? (770): I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no. http://tfl.nu/wmyv

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(732): View more from New Jersey

she woke up with a sticky ear

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(732): she woke up with a sticky ear http://tfl.nu/pkqo

Replies (2) Good night (1129) Bad night (1976)
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(217): View more from Illinois

How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???

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(217): How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you??? http://tfl.nu/p9qq

Replies (175) Good night (3084) Bad night (32826)
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(517): View more from Michigan

you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds

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(517): you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds http://tfl.nu/45sf

Replies (23) Good night (3986) Bad night (2078)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one

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(502): so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one http://tfl.nu/ezfm

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(307): View more from Wyoming

I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.

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(307): I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen. http://tfl.nu/qqp8

Replies (8) Good night (3858) Bad night (1618)
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(281): View more from Texas

I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.

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(281): I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked. http://tfl.nu/jbhc

Replies (8) Good night (3331) Bad night (1084)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.

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(413): Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor. http://tfl.nu/leq0

Replies (12) Good night (4375) Bad night (1733)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?

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(814): where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ? http://tfl.nu/ejao

Replies (8) Good night (2603) Bad night (827)
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(315): View more from New York

Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?

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(315): Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay? http://tfl.nu/8s61

Replies (14) Good night (2297) Bad night (1024)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.

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(505): It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm. http://tfl.nu/vdhu

Replies (15) Good night (4989) Bad night (902)
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(585): View more from New York

I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.

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(585): I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING. http://tfl.nu/4rg4

Replies (14) Good night (1495) Bad night (484)
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(240): View more from Maryland

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA

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(240): HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA http://tfl.nu/oasy

Replies (2) Good night (473) Bad night (646)
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(815): View more from Illinois

Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back

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(815): Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back http://tfl.nu/7smf

Replies (2) Good night (455) Bad night (194)
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(330): View more from Ohio

I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool

(217): View more from Illinois

Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito

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(330): I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool (217): Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito http://tfl.nu/fbuc

Replies (2) Good night (265) Bad night (143)

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