I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..