3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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