You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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