Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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