I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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