At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
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