Yo dont text me then not text me
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
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