Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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