There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
